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Inexperience

Why do I always feel disoriented when I begin?  From the start, I am hit with a head-on wave of confusion.  Amnesia overwhelms me.  I loose all memory of where I’ve been.  I don’t know what next step to take.  I panic.  My puny soul squeaks “Help! Help!  I am lost!”  Surely something is wrong.  Surely it’s not supposed to be this way.

But maybe it is, at least in part.  Maybe I am supposed to sense my utter inferiority.  So that I can reach out in dependence.  And take hold of Help that is significantly stronger than I.  What a thought – that the design of the task is that this would be my experience.

My task is designed to provide, to teach the realization that I am weak and God is strong and that his strength is made perfect in weakness … God in his mercy gives us something to do for which we know we are too small, too inexperienced, we lack.”

— Elisabeth Elliot, Faith and the Consciousness of Weakness. Gateway to Joy.

So, when I find welling up in me my sense of inadequacy, put on trust in God.

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